How your RELATIONSHIP blueprint was created?

If you didn’t have the kind of stable upbringing and healthy mother needed for development of an inner sense of security,

that created a kind of emptiness and insecurity inside you.

The parenting we receive as children affects us emotionally and socially in adulthood.

Our relationships with our closest caregiver/s, usually parents, influence our present relationships. More concretely, the way they responded (or didn’t respond) to our needs can shape our beliefs about ourselves (how worthy we are), about others (whether they can be trusted) and about relationships (what ‘love’ looks like).

The big part of that is building healthy attachment. Attachment is our innate (biological) drive to seek safety, to be protected from danger, and to form close and secure relationships.

How your love imprint affect your

BODY

Without fully sensing your body, there is no place for love to go to, to feel it.

You could not change your behavior or emotions in relationship with insights and reasoning.

When your emotions and your body keep sending signals that you are not safe with other people, from the part of the brain that keep memories of the past hurt

no intellectual knowledge can silence that part.

EMOTIONS

emotional neglect or emotional abuse

If your parents or caregivers criticize you, embarrass you, shame you, blame your or otherwise manipulate you that you will have deep emotional scars.

If your parents fail to respond enough to your emotional needs while they’re raising you, you could suffer from childhood emotional neglect.

Emotional neglect and scars from emotional abuse will cause you to either overreact or suppress your emotions. And become the part of your love imprint, the way you show, deal with or hide emotions in any relationship.

ATTACHMENT style

enjoying connection or craving for connection or running away from it

romantic partnerships share some characteristics of the early relationships between child and caregiver – such as feeling safe when together, and insecure when apart.

Changing your relationship blueprint

You could still create inner sense of security later in life even if you lacked it your childhood.

You can recreate it by rewiring your nervous systems through imagination and bilateral stimulation. We can’t change what happened to you in your childhood, but we can change how you feel inside.

Want to FIND WAY back to LOVE?

Yes, SHOW ME HOW

Hi, I'm Jollanda

You are not alone in this, I was there too

After years of searching for love and trying to get it from others, I was exhausted and depressed. I believed more and more that I am unlovable and that I don't deserve love.

Trying to love myself was as hard as trying to get love from others.

Only when I heal deep emotional wounds from the past and change my inner blueprint of relationship, the love found me.

And I also learned (the hard way) that without feeling safe in my body first I can not trust and love myself.

Nor I can trust and love other people and connect with them.